Anamika's Page

i feel happy and optimistic. a part of it is that i have hope and the possibility of favorable outcomes on a few things i care about in the future. there are leads that seem promising. so my happiness is predicated on this sense of possibiility. it is still a clinging towards outcomes in the future. the promise of particular attachments manifesting themselves in the way that i would like.

what will it take to have hope and optimism resting in the space of things just as they are? just in the pe… Continue

i've felt a curious psychic lightness this past week. carefree (which is not a feeling i am overly familiar with, being an oldest child and all).

today - good practice. b was on top form. i kept jamming my lower back; couldn't seem to open through my upper back for some reason. so couldn't get very far in back bends although did my best hands far behind toes in ustrasana. got further in parivritta trikonasana than ever before in my life.

yesterday - had a good strong spin workout in the am. so… Continue

Too lazy to be ambitious,
I let the world take care of itself.
Ten days' worth of rice in my bag;
a bundle of twigs by the fireplace.
Why chatter about delusion and enlightenment?
Listening to the night rain on my roof,
I sit comfortably, with both legs stretched out.

-- Ryokan

This sentiment has been true of my yoga practice (I have talked myself out of it two days in a row now) but not my life. It needs to be the other way around!!!!

Sat's practice was fabulous. I cannot remember specifics… Continue

always a trouble-matic thing for me. sears me, singes, scorches, deep deep deep inside, places that i don't want to have, to see, that scare me. i react with aching pain, not even mine own, too weighty to hold. merely to hold on to something i am not sure i want in the way i have. but to preserve its good bits. so precious. to meet some vestiges of need.

but they are always in my heart. circularity. mind and heart not on speaking terms. mind - rational. heart - emotional. twain warring, both se… Continue

this is what the voice in my head told me the other day. out of the blue. interesting. i must somehow be looking for salvation.

tue practice was lackluster. good, solid, not stellar. i was just really tired. did what i could.

wed was life yoga. i needed the break i think. had coffee with a perspective restoring friend in the time that i would have normally gone to yoga. i have also been sleeping poorly this week so was just tired i think.

thu was a class taught by a very energetic teacher. it… Continue